Friday, September 2, 2016

Kamisu Reina Series Volume 2: Reina Kamisu Scatters Here

Chapter 1: Yukimi Mitsui

Voices are like invisible razor blades to me.

We are all alone from birth to death, and even though we can’t really understand each other we are still forced to associate all along the way. There are only two ways out: biological death or social death.

The world is brimming with people observing me, no matter where I escape.
And again, another day starts where I am forced to blend into a group.

I am suffocating, crammed into a tiny, narrow box, our classroom, together with various people who keep attacking me.

We’re on a small break right now. Girls are noisy beings, and as such, even the high level of this school doesn’t stop them from nattering away with their shrill voices. Female voices are—perhaps because they’re higher than male voices—very sharp. Sharp like razorblades.

Laughter. Certainly not directed at me. But it sounds to me like they’re sneering at me.

“Your face is a mess today, isn’t it?”, “Stop spreading bad mood,” “Aren’t her legs quite fat?”, “She completely messed up that question there, didn’t she? And she sucks at English, anyway,” “Isn’t something smelling funny here?” “I bet she’s a slut,” “Disgusting,” “Gross,”

“Sickening.”

They’re not saying these things against me. They’re not saying them against me. I’m not as odd as to be called such things.

But my imagination won’t stop taking their voices as attacks against me.
Stop it! Don’t talk in front of me!

“Stop being so noisy!”
A shout reverberates, shrouding the classroom in silence... with my voice.

Astonishment and some discontent for being yelled at without a reason shows on their faces. But as expected from Junseiwa students, not a single one of them shows any anger. Instead, they resume their conversations with quieter voices than before.

But it’s not like they don’t care. Deep inside, they must hate me; they must feel the urge to attack me.
And like this, I continue to get myself into a jam. In order not to get hurt, I isolate myself from others and keep everyone away. But by doing so, I also lose the chance to fi nd someone who understands me and supports me, and I stay in the dark about what they think of me. As a result, anxiety keeps growing.

“She pisses me off!” someone groans and others laugh in response.
My body tenses up.


To continue reading, you can download the file here!